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The Virtues Gazette "Bringing Virtues To Life" |
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The Virtues Gazette "Bringing Virtues To Life" |
August 2003 FREE SUBSCRIPTION PREVIOUS ISSUES Web site: http://www.VirtuesConsulting.com Email: Toll-free phone: 1-866-386-0253 * Phone/Fax: 250-746-3626 Tell a friend! Feel free to forward this newsletter to others. IN THIS ISSUE
CORRECTION: In the July issue the poem Anyway was attributed to Mother Theresa. In fact it was written by Kent M. Keith. It's published in his book Anyway: The Paradoxical Commandments: Finding Personal Meaning in a Crazy World, 2001, G.P. Putnam's Sons, NY. Thank you Nelson LeDuc for this correction. 1. EVENTS Full Calendar Registration Form Phone registration: 1-866-386-0253 Nancy Watters would love to come to your organization and provide on-site training that is cost-effective, convenient and customized to meet your objectives. Sample program descriptions "The most profound professional workshop that I have attended in years." Gillian Krantz, Educator, Abbottsford, BC about The Virtues Project SEPTEMBER 12-13-- A SOUL FULL ELDERHOOD with Linda and Dan Popov, Victoria Truth Centre, Victoria, BC. Phone: 250-478-6945 Fax: 250-995-1257 Email: thora.ogrady@shaw.ca OCTOBER 17-19--AWAKENING THE VIRTUES WITHIN-Introduction to The Virtues Project™--a personal and professional development program at a serene retreat center, in Victoria, Canada. Experience transformative activities that inspire the practice of virtues in everyday life. Learn five skills used worldwide in classrooms, homes and workplaces to raise morally conscious children, create peaceful schools, enhance workforce integrity, and cultivate personal growth. Fulfills the prerequisite for facilitator training. Learn more . . . OCTOBER 24--SHAPING CHARACTER: CREATING A CULTURE OF VIRTUES IN OUR SCHOOLS-- a professional development workshop that introduces The Virtues Project™ to educators, administrators, counselors and parents. Victoria, BC. Learn more . . . NOVEMBER 6-8--VIRTUES PROJECT FACILITATOR TRAINING--Prerequisite is 2-day course Awakening The Virtues Within (see above) or equivalent. With Licensed Trainer Pam Auffray. Chilliwack, B.C., Canada. Contact pgauffray@shaw.ca. 2. VIRTUE OF THE MONTH--HONESTY When people list the character traits they'd like demonstrated by their children, friends, civic and corporate leaders, honesty tops the list. People recognize that honesty is the foundation for most other virtues and the basis for trust. I humbly submit that this is harder than it seems. I consider myself an honest person and most readers of this newsletter probably do as well. Yet I caught myself in two instances of "little white lies" yesterday--"Has your luggage been in your control at all times?", "Are you bringing any food into the country?". Other examples popped up too. A friend took an extra plate of salad from the salad bar and gave it to someone at our table who had not paid for it. A bar tender gave me a soda and chose not to charge me (and I accepted.) There are many minor forms of dishonesty I realized. Asking children to say "mommy isn't home", when she is. Telling a seven-year-old to lie about their age so that they can take advantage of the "Six and under eat free" policy. Exaggerating, false flattery, lying to protect wrongdoers, "borrowing" items from work are all examples of seemingly innocent ways that we chip away at honesty. Are these behaviors really harmless? Or do they contribute to an overall milieu of dishonesty and distrust? What do our children learn from our example? Research in the United States indicates a growing crisis in honesty at all levels of society from kindergarten to corporations. In one study of 100,000 young people, for example, more than 50% admitted to having shop lifted at least once and most of those said they would do it again. Another nationwide survey found that 76% of college freshmen and sophomores admitted to having cheated in high school. Even more disturbing was another survey which found that half the respondents did not believe that cheating was wrong. Read More Other cultures have a different perspective on plagiarism, by the way. In some societies, for example, teachers have a high station and their words are considered the final authority. Instruction is done through rote learning and memorization. It is considered respectful to use what experts have written rather than use your own thoughts, which are less informed. It's important to consider the cultural context in defining the behaviors that are attached to honesty or any other virtue and to make expectations explicit. In spite of the above statistics, I believe that the vast majority of people are honest most of the time. For example, the other day I inadvertently left my car door wide open while I went shopping for an hour at a Victoria mall. When I returned nothing was taken from the car! This month I plan to look for more examples of "honesty under pressure" and acknowledge them. (Send your examples and I'll print them next month.) Telling people that you notice and appreciate their honesty is one of the most effective ways to increase honest behavior. Try saying, "I appreciate your honesty when you ___(behavior)", or "Thanks for being honest when you _______". Another way to roll back moral drift includes clearly defining honesty and then actively conveying these standards. Honesty includes not lying, cheating or stealing. It includes being free of deceit and not even fooling yourself. It also implies intellectual honesty -- searching out the truth, even if it what you learn is unpleasant. Next, promote the benefits of being honest. Use concrete facts to refute those who preach the necessity of lying, cheating and stealing to get ahead. Honesty does pay. It builds trust and "social capital". It provides positive results for organizations including greater profitability, lower turnover and a positive working climate. It builds trust which fosters greater innovation and collaboration. In schools trust boosts academic achievement. A major study of 400 Chicago schools demonstrated that relational trust was a key component of effective school reform efforts. Schools that had weak trust reports had "virtually no chance of improving in either reading or mathematics." Trust was built through the personal integrity of school leaders, honesty in day-to-day interpersonal exchanges between all members of the school community, and active outreach to parents. (Anthony S.Bryk and Barbara Schneider, Trust in Schools: A Core Resource For Improvement, 2002) And what about the personal benefits? From What Do You Stand For? by Barbara Lewis
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